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“Mom, Reagan took my toy!”
“I had it first”
“No you didn’t! You took it from me!”
“I did not!”
Do your kids fight a lot? Does it drive you crazy? Welll, you are not alone. Sibling fighting is a really hot topic of discussion among our parents. So how do you stop sibling fighting in your home? Here’s one out of the box suggestion.
Our kids have heard us say this statement many times in our home:
Relationships are more important than stuff.
How do you solve the toy fight? They can’t figure out how to share. The older child is bigger so they can control the toy and the younger child is throwing a fit because they feel pushed around. One child tries to grab the toy from the other and then there is more yelling and pushing until someone gets hurt – either by the sibling or by the yelling of the parent J.
Simply remove the toy from both of them and tell them, “In our home, your relationship with each other is more important than any toy we have. If you guys can’t figure out how to share this toy, then the toy is going away until you can figure it out together. I don’t want to put the toy away but I will unless we can figure out a way to share it. Now let’s think of some ways we can share. What do you think we should do?”
Then don’t give them the ideas right away. Let them come up with a good solution on their own if they can and then give them some time to implement their strategy. Give them a few chances to work it out. Again, try to stay out of the discussions and let them work it out. If they can’t work it out, put the toy away for say an hour and tell them they can have another chance later.
Relationships are more important than stuff. As you continue to use this strategy, you will see your kids work things out more often.
Want more resources?
- Sign up for Basecamp. We have an entire course in Basecamp about the Kid to Kid Relationship.
- Order our book Five Ways to Stop Sibling Fighting in our CCF Store. It is a short book packed with tips on establishing a Best Friends Culture in your home.