Navigating Differences with Grandparents

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As a grandparent, I love to spoil my grandkids. For sure, I don’t have the same standards for candy and sweets that my kids—i.e. their parents -- have. Want an ice cream cone? Let’s go! Have a double dip!

An ice cream cone is a minor difference. How about you and your parents? Are there differences there? Minor differences? Maybe major differences? Maybe your parents are not believers. Maybe when your child goes over there they let them watch things you don’t want them to watch.  How do you handle these situations with your Mom and Dad?

A couple of tips:

1. Don’t sweat the small stuff. So often we let little things like a piece of candy get in the way of the big picture of the value of the grandparent relationships for the kids. Let life be a little different at Yaya’s house. Your kids will live through it.

2. Don’t let the guilt of your parents dictate your actions. This one is a little harder but important. Your job as a parent is to obey God. If you feel like the Lord is telling you to do things different than your parents or limit your kids’ time with your parents, then you do what is best for your family.  As you feel that disappointment from your parents, take it to God to heal you and confirm your direction.

One more thing: There are no right answers here and your answer may be different than the parents in your friend group. Your family is unique and God’s direction for your family is unique as well.

Overall try to work it out with Mom and Dad but there are times it is good to set boundaries and there are times in parenting you are going to disappoint your parents. Obviously, the more differences there are, the more boundaries you will have to set but try your best to make it work. Remember, God values relationships.